youre lurking in front of me
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
