I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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