Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Randomize