Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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