You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize