He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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