You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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