If i come over, it means nothing
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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