Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I have fence marks all over my body
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
