My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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