Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Randomize
