I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize