Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Randomize
