Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
a search helicopter?!
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
