Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
