you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Randomize
