Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize