i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
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