Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
