I could have mohawked her pubes.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Randomize
