Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
