Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
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