i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
