he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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