About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
