I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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