Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
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