i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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