Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
my shit smells like andre
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Randomize
