wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
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