I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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