Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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