Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize