I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
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