I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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