Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
