yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
