i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Randomize