is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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