I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Green mimosas i think yes
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize