One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
