the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
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I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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