Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
