Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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