A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
