so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Watching her eat just hurts me
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
