Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
You ruined the universe
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
