Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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