Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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