No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
PANTIES FOUND
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