white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
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