Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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